Knowledge
by Twisted Wonderland
Summary: He’d always been the type who wanted knowledge. He just couldn’t be sure of what was reliable. Jonathan x OC!Alice.


**Disclaimer**: I don't own Jonathan Crane or anything DC-related. I wish on every shooting star, but those things must be defective. Alice belongs to Mary, although I suppose I hold some dominion over her, but only because I can bully Mary (due to the fact I luff her).

**Author's Note:**

I hope this makes you giggle, when reading this. It's a mix between Humor and Fluff, I suppose, but I enjoyed writing it. Jonathan may be a tad OOC here, but I tried to avoid it. Honestly.

-x-

"Jon? What are you reading?" Alice's voice was filled with curiosity and, although he consented that it could've been his imagination, suspicion. Crane immediately shifted, to assure the psychology book concealed the smaller one inside. Then he offered her his best calm stare to where she lurked in the doorway.

"Just some of Jung's work." He lied, blinking before clearing his throat in a guilty fashion, hoping Alice didn't realize his nervous habit. "Why?"

Her brown stare didn't leave him. "I got flowers today."

He did his best to appear unfazed by her challenging tone. "Yes."

"From you."

Silence for a moment. "Yes."

"Why?"

Although he'd allowed his gaze to drift downwards (as part of the whole 'total nonchalance' thing), he couldn't help but focus his blue eyes on her with the faintest hint of disbelief. "I thought women liked flowers."

He wasn't imagining it any longer. Her brown eyes held out-right suspicion. "Yes. But I'm not most women."

A heartbeat passed. He frowned. "You don't like them, then?"

Alice sighed. "No, Jonathan, that's not it at all. They're perfect." The small woman pursued her lips faintly, regarding him with scrutiny. But when his blue eyes weren't forthcoming, she simply gave a smile and crossed the room to lean against his desk. "I was just surprised, I guess." The black-haired woman bent to nuzzle against his jaw slightly, offering him a light kiss at the top of his neck. "Thank you."

As soon as she neared him, Jonathan's eyes gave a satisfied gleam. The little book had been right, then. But by the time he realized that he'd forgotten its innocent position, Alice had noticed it. "What's this?" Immediately she lifted it – he made an uncharacteristic snap in an effort to recover it – and moved out of his long reach. The doctor forced himself to remain in his seat, procuring that look of total passiveness again. Her lips turned down in curiosity as she read the book title. "Inside Her Mind: The Guide to a Woman's Heart."

There was a moment of silence as it seemed to sink in. Then, the unthinkable happened – she started to laugh.

It was clear that she was trying not to do so, for his sake, but the giggles escaped anyways. Each of them was like a tiny stab to his pride and he couldn't hide the small streak of red that spread across his cheeks.

His expression hardened and he looked away from where she stood still clutching the book. Although he was filled with a mixture of mortification and embarrassment, the laughter was applying salt to old wounds, reminding him of his high school days. If there was anything Jonathan Crane hated, it was being laughed at – having been younger than his classmates, and unbearably tall and coltish, this had led to him being the object of some rather intense bullying, sometimes to a horribly cruel extent. Alice's amusement, however, bothered him in a different way from his ruthless school companions, and it was causing an indignant anger to build in his chest.

"I suppose you'll have to forgive me for caring." The doctor growled, blue eyes hard and steely, even as they refused to fall upon his Alice. "I was simply trying to learn more about you, perhaps try to make you happy. I'm aware that this cannot be the most pleasant place to live-" He gestured about. "-having to pretend you have no idea who I am, being so confined…" Jonathan paused to take a deep, frustrated breath, ignoring Alice, who was steadily drawing closer again. "I just hoped you would appreciate something extra."

Silence stretched for a moment after his monologue. He was clearly still frustrated, frowning deeply at the wall; finally, Alice broke the silence. "Jon." Her voice was soft and gentle – he couldn't help but turn to look up at her. It was a reflexive reaction, and the moment he did, her arms fell around his neck, and she settled into the seat with him, like a large lapdog. As he stiffened, she leaned up to kiss him softly. He refused to relent at first, clearly wanting to cling to his anger. But her hand lifted to brush against his cheek, and Jonathan felt his reluctance fade. His body relaxed and he allowed her to kiss him more properly. As she pulled back to gaze at him, her fingers traced his lips in a delicate motion. "Jonathan Crane." Alice said, her voice reproachful and chiding. "I cannot believe you." The questioning look on his face prompted her to continue. "How can you even imagine that I'm not happy here?"

The doctor frowned at her. "With the life you had before? How could you be?" He had held that as more fact than opinion; after all, it seemed impossible that she could favor her new, reclusive lifestyle more.

She gave a light sigh at him. "Yes, I loved Wayne Manor." Alice responded, her eyes getting that far-away look as she remembered her life as a maid. "It was beautiful and timeless and there was always something happening, some sort of party or gala. I had a great job; Alfred was patient and Bruce was so fun to tease." His jaw tightened slightly and he looked away from her once more – it was far too easy to remember that first reaction to his fear toxin, when she'd called out for Gotham's Prince instead.

Suddenly he felt her hand flutter gently against his face once more. "Wayne Manor was lovely. But," Alice applied pressure with her fingers to turn him towards her, so that she forced his eyes to meet hers. "But there was no you. I left it of my own will, if you remember, Doctor Crane." Her tone was suddenly firm, perhaps even formal. "And I've got no intentions of going back."

His eyes, which had been so icy moments before, seemed to relax now. He graced her with a small smile – a real one, not the pompous smirk that often adorned his features – and now used his own hands to guide her to his face so that he could kiss her in his form of an apology. She kissed him back, and then curled into his side, letting her head rest on his shoulder and her legs fall horizontally across his. Her hands fell to cling to his coarse jacket, and a few moments of comfortable silenced passed as Jon recovered his psychological text, beginning to read it instead.

About five minutes had passed when Alice suddenly gave a light stir. "Jonathan?"

His eyebrows raised and he uttered a distracted noise to indicate that he was listening, eyes still moving along the page.

"Am I really that much of a mystery to you?"

He paused to look down at her and offered his trademark smirk. "Curiouser and curiouser."

-x-

**Another Author's Note**:

Yeah, he bought one of those lame books. Mary and I thought it'd be funny for him to do something like that. :3 Kicks and giggles, my friends. Hope you like this, Mary. Hope Alice isn't OOC.


End file.
